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looking for the constructive kind of critique

 
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Lyle Stencer
Voice Talent



Joined: 02 Jan 2008
Posts: 3

PostPosted: Tue Mar 04, 2008, 22:50 (GMT)    Post subject: looking for the constructive kind of critique Reply with quote

just starting and am hoping for some guidance as to what I should be working on. ----be gentle I bruise easily Cool


lyle - Track 01.mp3
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just a variety of what I can do

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Scott Pollak
Voice Talent - Voice Seeker



Joined: 05 Mar 2004
Posts: 3828

PostPosted: Tue Mar 04, 2008, 23:06 (GMT)    Post subject: Reply with quote

If you bruise easily, then you're in the wrong business, Lyle.

Wink

I'll hold off a bit and see what others offer up here.

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Lee Kanne
Voice Talent



Joined: 20 Dec 2005
Posts: 129

PostPosted: Tue Mar 04, 2008, 23:27 (GMT)    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lyle,

Dude, are you submitting this as your demo? if you are it's WAY too frikkin long......also,

1) you have promo, character and commercial spots all mixed together, not a good idea
2) all your reads sound way affected to me...real, conversational
and strong voice acting is where it's at these days....
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Allison Scussel
Voice Talent



Joined: 25 Apr 2007
Posts: 928

PostPosted: Wed Mar 05, 2008, 04:15 (GMT)    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lyle,
Being bruised is one thing. This may require a few stitches.

Don't concentrate so much on your voice. It's deep, but you sound like you're reading and it's not natural. Don't focus on the depth of your tone. Be real and talk to the listener. Imagine you're talking to your wife or next door neighbor.

Good luck and heal fast!

~Allison~

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AllisonScussel@comcast.net
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Melba Sibrel
Voice Talent - Voice Seeker



Joined: 22 Dec 2004
Posts: 661

PostPosted: Wed Mar 05, 2008, 04:16 (GMT)    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with Scott. You're in the wrong business.

Alright, alright. Honestly, the demo isn't good and your reads aren't good. Lee's right....this is voice acting. I'm not sure I'm hearing the germ of such a talent in what you've presented. You'll have a lot of work to be seriously competitive outside a very localized area, I think.

First listen to a bunch of reels on voicebank. Then be absolutely honest with yourself. Can you compete with that and are you willing to do the work it will take? If you are, go take some acting for script interp help first. See if you can learn to act without sounding like you're acting.

Sorry for the bruises.
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Lance Blair
Voice Talent - Voice Seeker



Joined: 25 Apr 2005
Posts: 591

PostPosted: Wed Mar 05, 2008, 05:47 (GMT)    Post subject: Reply with quote

nuts and bolts time:

Your diction is poor, you need to work on your tongue and lip control. Work on your breath control while you're at it.

Instead of being controlled and clear, you're over compensating with hitting the small words like "AND" too hard and being way too sing-songy. You slur through key phrases, and then sweat the small stuff: it's very stilted. Try to think more in terms of phrases dependent upon the action of the verbs to improve your reads.

Being cutesy and sing songy doesn't equal connecting with the script or with the listener. Remember, you are only talking to one person.

Get control of your voice before thinking that being cute and clever is the way into this biz. It isn't. Our job is to have the complete control over our voices to bring out the cute and cleverness/what have you of the agencies, the writers, the messages on demand...

You have the energy: focus it.

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Atlanta voiceovers www.lanceblair.net
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