Please critique my demo

Richie O'Shea · **Voice Talent** Joined: 29 Feb 2008 Posts: 5

Hi, I have been doing commercial work for ages and would like to do more station imaging work. Please let me know what you think.

Richie

Lance Blair · Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008, 21:09 (GMT) Post subject:

I liked the second half of this more where we heard more of your voice which cuts really nicely through even heavy mix. I like your voice a lot, though.

I'm not into imagining, myself, so is this demo trying to show off your voice for imaging or your imaging production skills, or both? The first half seemed production focused, and the second half seemed vo focused.

Richie O'Shea · **Voice Talent** Joined: 29 Feb 2008 Posts: 5

Thanks Lance, I appreciate the comments. I didn't produce any of this, they are just bits of recent sessions produced by an imaging and production company here in Ireland.

I'm doing a voice over for an interactive medical cd-rom tomorrow which I think will be just straight voice, perhaps I should put that up and see what I'm like naked Rolling Eyes

If there are any voice coaches on the site or if anyone knows of any in Ireland please let me know..

Richie O'Shea · **Voice Talent** Joined: 29 Feb 2008 Posts: 5

Here is a read for an interactive medical program that shows me naked.
Please critique....

Melba Sibrel · Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2008, 16:45 (GMT) Post subject:

I felt the read was just a tad too fast. But that's from a layperson's ear -- perhaps if this is for medical professionals it's not too fast.

I do know, however, you had a bit of a sing-song wave to your read. I didn't feel you were telling me something or teaching me. I felt you were just reading words to which you had little connection.

It's okay, but it could be better. Like most of us...."naked". Laughing

Scott Pollak · Posted: Fri Mar 14, 2008, 17:01 (GMT) Post subject:

I'm with Melba on this (gee, whatta surprise!).

I've done a LOT of medical narration and it's hard to balance the technical aspects with a humanistic approach.

Richie, you have a pleasant voice and terrific diction, but your delivery is pretty bland here. There is that most definite, predictable 'sing-songy' aspect that Melba alluded to, and a pretty pronounced lack of involvement here. What I'm hearing here is:

"Okay, I'm going to give you a lot of facts now. Be sure to write this all down. There will be a test."

... as opposed to hearing:

"While I'm going to be using some pretty heavy words here, please realize that this is real stuff that affects real people on a day-to-day basis. And even if it doesn't concern you directly, it might one day. Or it might affect someone you love".

Work towards being more conversational on things like this.

Richie O'Shea · **Voice Talent** Joined: 29 Feb 2008 Posts: 5

Thank you both for your well received critiques.
This was a long project and had been rewritten so many times by the client while I was recording I am surprised that you didn't hear the frustration in my read.
The project was aimed at medical professionals and there were to be clips of doctors peppered in with the narration. I guess the problem here for me was how to balance the fact that I had no idea of what I was talking about with the fact that I really had no idea of what I was talking about..
Thanks again.
I think I will stick to commercials and imaging.. Cool