My Demo

Kelly Atchison · Posted: Mon May 26, 2008, 21:01 (GMT) Post subject: My Demo

Hi Guys,

I found this forum a few months back & I'm addicted - there is some amazing talent here.

Could you take a listen to my demo & offer a critique?

Thanks so much - I really appreciate it.

Kelly

Melba Sibrel · Posted: Mon May 26, 2008, 22:38 (GMT) Post subject:

Hey, there. You've got that rich "Maybelline" voice, as I like to call it. Quick impressions: the 2nd clip had a phrase I couldn't understand which you read in rhythm to the background music -- maybe that was intentional, but I couldn't decipher the words. Other listeners might have the same trouble. Inflections in the Remax spot and on the last clip right after "yoga" were stilted -- didn't sound very natural. Your character-y reads (the lady with the crying baby, for instance) don't sound quite committed enough.

That being said, when I listen to folks' demos and throw some opinions out, I always like to read the stuff on their pages. Reading yours, I have the impression that you have a wry, self-effacing, smart sense of humor. But I don't quite hear the strength of that kind of personality in your reads. I realize these are probably all actual spots from the station/group that employs you. I might suggest on the next rendition of your demo you produce a few clips just for you -- or push the bar up on your delivery on your day to day work so you can have some better clips. See, to me, it sounds like you're reading the way a broadcaster reads (there's a place for that) but to procure VO work outside, you can be more marketable if you can voice act and if you can talk to me, rather than be the power voice broadcaster.

The thing that got me out of that broadcast delivery was, believe or not, improv. I highly recommend it. Also, if you've never had it, some script interp and basic acting. I feel like a broken record. It's what I always say. But I just know it worked for me. Just a thought. Best of luck to you! And break out of the broadcaster babe mold! You'll be glad you did.

Jenna Sharpe · Posted: Mon Jun 02, 2008, 00:19 (GMT) Post subject:

Hi Kelly. I agree, these forums are great.

Yeah totally a Maybelline voice (we have that same ad over here)!
I agree with Melba, I can't make out the 2nd spot, I liked the one after it though with the baby.

I don't get the ice cube spot. Am I supposed to or am I just being thick? I like the sexiness in your voice though.

Something about the 'Summer is just around the corner spot' really irritated my ears. Is it too much treble perhaps? I would say that is less you and more the mixing.

The Deweys Pool spot: Where mostly Canadian is on tap? I can't quite make it out. I am guessing it is a brand of beer I don't know about.

Remax: Good choice to put a really short spot in to break it up and it was much clearer than the previous spot.

Princess Cruises. Heard this kind of spot a million times before. It is like 'my demo must have a whispery cruise advert on'. I know cos I did exactly the same hehe. It is a bit lispy on the 'inclusive princess cruise'. I am a real stickler for proper pronunciation though.

The yoga spot. You could maybe make even more out of the 'are you stiff and out of shape?' part, but I liked the remainder.

Overall I think you have a really nice voice and that this is generally well mixed and packs a lot into 1 minute. However, the only spot that stood out for me was the baby one (partly cos of the loud baby). The rest reverted to the singsongy broadcaster voice we hear so often. You have some good copy in this demo though and I think you could make more of it by showing us more of you and your personality. I wouldn't bother commenting if I didn't think so!

Kelly Atchison · Posted: Wed Jun 04, 2008, 03:34 (GMT) Post subject:

Thank you so much both of you!

You've offered some great advice & I totally see where you are coming from.....I'm going to redo & rework my demo and then come right back here for another critique! Very Happy

Thanks again! Much appreciated

Deby Cedars · Posted: Wed Jun 04, 2008, 04:15 (GMT) Post subject:

I really liked the music bed on the bogo spot.....Did you do the production on this?

David Love · Posted: Wed Jun 04, 2008, 19:14 (GMT) Post subject:

Jenna Sharpe · Posted: Wed Jun 04, 2008, 22:39 (GMT) Post subject:

Molson... yeah that makes more sense. Smile

Is it a nice beer?

Although Mostly Canadian could be a good name too. Its like those Goodfellas Italian pizzas that are actually made in Germany or Fosters Australian Lager which is brewed over here.

Anyway I digress

Kelly Atchison · Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008, 14:42 (GMT) Post subject:

So now my demo critique has turned into a Canadian beer discussion!

As I sit down to redo some of my demo - would I be better off with no music beds and just dry reads? Or a mix of both or all produced?

Melba Sibrel · Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008, 14:51 (GMT) Post subject:

Maybelline voice is what I call the very smooth rich classic tone that developed in female VO in the late 60's early 70's. It was first heard on Maybelline TV ads. It was pretty much the only voice to have (if you were a woman) for 20 years or so. Thank God things have changed to include more than just that now, but it's still a standard sound.

If you're asking questions about whether or not to put music on your demo, you need to halt production for a while and go listen to other professional demos...get a feel for what's out there. Go to voicebank.net and listen to lots and lots of reels. You'll learn what's out there, how it's structured and be able to hear what you're up against if you want to compete outside your current market. Good luck!