A new guy to the group posting a demo for critique :-)

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Greetings All,

I would value feedback on my commercial demo. I've read many of the posts in this group and in the "Idol" group (where I also posted this message). I notice the many talented and experienced VO artists offering positive and constructive criticism. I would welcome hearing what you have to suggest after listening to the attached demo.

Thanks in advance to those of you taking the time to read, listen and perhaps offer a comment or two.

Regards,
Dana Negrey (I"m A Guy!)

Claire Dodin · **Voice Talent** Joined: 16 Aug 2005 Posts: 400

Hi Dana!
Here's the only criticism I can think of:
It's a beautiful demo, you have a great voice, I love it!
I mean it, you sound really great to my French ears! Very Happy

Scott Pollak · Posted: Thu Jul 19, 2007, 12:37 (GMT) Post subject:

Dana,

Overall a very good demo with a good range and good production. There are a few small nits I'd pick:
- Lose the very end of the Acura spot where it says 2004 Acura TL. It really dates the spot. You have more than enough of the spot up to that point and that tells me that you haven't done a car spot in the last 3 years (or else you'd have put it on the reel)
- I get the impression you're like I am: much more comfortable with soft-sell and 'real' than hard sell. You may want to keep ONE of your higher-energy pieces on there (and if I had to choose it'd be the first one, the Gatorade piece), but I found the Astrodome bit annoying and not at ALL in your strength area.
- I'd lose the "London drugs" byte, too. Very forgettable plus it's filled with advertising cliche's.
- I'd also mix up the reel a bit. You open with 3 straight 'down' pieces before hitting the Gatorade bit.

I DO love the simple basic slate at the beginning.
And there's no question you have the goods. Overall, great stuff and you can compete and land the jobs, methinks. And even if you don't change anything on the demo, it's still good... just not perfect yet.

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Scott,

Thank you for taking the time to listen and offer your suggestions. I really am appreciative of your recommendations.

Great point you made on the year still on the reel; I hadn't considered that. I think you've also got some great intuition, too: you're right about my being more comfortable with the "real" read rather than the hard sell.

Thanks again!

Dana

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Bob Souer · **Voice Talent** Joined: 07 Sep 2004 Posts: 180

Dana,

I echo Scott's point, especially regarding the final cut of the demo. If someone listens that far, I think it hurts your cause rather than helping to close the deal.

But, you have some very nice material there. Much success to you.

Debbie Deutsch · **Voice Talent** Joined: 25 Oct 2006 Posts: 1338

Oh yah, great voice, wonderful touch on the softer sell stuff.
Yea, football was annoying. I think I heard your vocal cords stretching, ouch!!
Coffee/kid in the crosswalk was gripping!
Can you do younger voices? You sound very family man sort of pitch, which is fine really, but how about older teen? Young 20's? Unless you are in your 20's!!?? Smile

Maxine Dunn · **Voice Talent** Joined: 25 Apr 2004 Posts: 675

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Maxine Dunn · **Voice Talent** Joined: 25 Apr 2004 Posts: 675

Dana Negrey · **Voice Talent** Joined: 14 Jul 2004 Posts: 32

Hi Maxine,

That's really good feedback... thank you. I hadn't thought about "younger" in terms of cadence, pace, etc. I appreciate the food for thought.

I've really been made to feel welcome with the forum. Thanks again!

Cheers,
Dana